Forgiveness, Grief, Shame and Addiction

Before my sister died, there was a lot of conflict between us because of her addiction. She would mass text and email me and lock up the crappy little phone I had way back then. Most of her rants made little sense, and there were things said between us that were very angry and hurtful.
Then she died, and all that just washed away in grief and guilt. I forgot about those texts and emails for 6 years, until the other day when I was exploring my old Yahoo account and found them.
I was three years sober at the time of her death. But two years sober when the emails were sent. I was very intolerant, unforgiving, ready to attack, swear, shame…
I had a responsibility, as a sober Christian person, to be more loving, not to swear, to pray through my anger. To use a calmer head.
I am not saying that I am perfect now, for I am far from it. But grief and loss have taught me to take a more subtle approach when possible. Yes, absolutely tell an addict that they will die if they go on. But love them. Make sure that they know that there is always HOPE.
Why did I drink? Mostly because of guilt and shame. If we seek to show how forgiving we can be, while also not tolerating the act of addiction, how much easier it would be for an addict to seek treatment. And the phrase “You can’t do it on your own,” is a very true statement. None of us can do this life alone.
I have found my peace with Jesus Christ, He stands firmly behind me in my walk with sobriety. He forgives my past slips and relapses, with His abounding grace. Knowing that He does so makes me desire alcohol less. I would not be here today but for Him. That is agape love.

“The Generation That Shall Not Pass Away” on YouTube

This is the Olivet Discourse, the biblical passages in Matthew 24 & 25, Mark 13 and Luke 21 that refer to the Generation that Shall not Pass Away. I’ve posted a link to a video about who this generation is, about the length of a generation, who the fig tree represents, and how important this sign is. If you want to understand what is going on in bible prophecy, it is crucial to watch and study these passages.
Matthew 24:28-33

28¶“Now learn the parable from the fig tree: when its branch has already become tender and puts forth its leaves, you know that summer is near.

29“Even so, you too, when you see these things happening, recognize that He is near, right at the door.

30“Truly I say to you, this generation will not pass away until all these things take place. [This generation is the generation that is in existence now since the rebirth of Israel].

31“Heaven and earth will pass away, but My words will not pass away.

32“But of that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but the Father alone.

33¶“Take heed, keep on the alert; for you do not know when the appointed time will come. [Be a watchman on the wall].

Matthew 24:36

36¶“But of that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, nor the Son, but the Father alone. [The rapture].

Matthew 25:1-13

1¶“Then the kingdom of heaven will be comparable to ten virgins, who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom.

2“Five of them were foolish, and five were prudent.

3“For when the foolish took their lamps, they took no oil with them,

4 but the prudent took oil in flasks along with their lamps.

5“Now while the bridegroom was delaying, they all got drowsy and began to sleep.

6“But at midnight there was a shout, ‘Behold, the bridegroom! Come out to meet him.’

7“Then all those virgins rose and trimmed their lamps.

8“The foolish said to the prudent, ‘Give us some of your oil, for our lamps are going out.’

9“But the prudent answered, ‘No, there will not be enough for us and you too; go instead to the dealers and buy some for yourselves.’

10“And while they were going away to make the purchase, the bridegroom came, and those who were ready went in with him to the wedding feast; and the door was shut.

11“Later the other virgins also came, saying, ‘Lord, lord, open up for us.’

12“But he answered, ‘Truly I say to you, I do not know you.’

13“Be on the alert then, for you do not know the day nor the hour.

Mark 13:27-37

27“And then He will send forth the angels, and will gather together His elect from the four winds, from the farthest end of the earth to the farthest end of heaven.
28¶“Now learn the parable from the fig tree: when its branch has already become tender and puts forth its leaves, you know that summer is near.
29“Even so, you too, when you see these things happening, fnrecognize that He is near, right at the door.
30“Truly I say to you, this generation will not pass away until all these things take place.
31“Heaven and earth will pass away, but My words will not pass away.
32“But of that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but the Father alone.
33¶“Take heed, keep on the alert; for you do not know when the appointed time will come.
34“It is like a man away on a journey, who upon leaving his house and putting his slaves in charge, assigning to each one his task, also commanded the doorkeeper to stay on the alert.
35“Therefore, be on the alert—for you do not know when the master of the house is coming, whether in the evening, at midnight, or when the rooster crows, or in the morning—
36 in case he should come suddenly and find you asleep.
37“What I say to you I say to all, ‘Be on the alert!’”

Luke 21:29-38

29¶Then He told them a parable: “Behold the fig tree and all the trees;
30 as soon as they put forth leaves, you see it and know for yourselves that summer is now near.
31“So you also, when you see these things happening, recognize that the kingdom of God is near.
32“Truly I say to you, this generation will not pass away until all things take place.
33“Heaven and earth will pass away, but My words will not pass away.
34¶“Be on guard, so that your hearts will not be weighted down with dissipation and drunkenness and the worries of life, and that day will not come on you suddenly like a trap;
35 for it will come upon all those who dwell on the face of all the earth.
36“But keep on the alert at all times, praying that you may have strength to escape all these things that are about to take place, and to stand before the Son of Man.”
37¶Now during the day He was teaching in the temple, but at evening He would go out and spend the night on the mount that is called Olivet. [Hence why it’s called the Olivet Discourse].
38And all the people would get up early in the morning to come to Him in the temple to listen to Him.