Domestic Violence

SAD

Too many disappointments have been reaped from a sorrow-filled life…

Too many tears I have shed, for a man who called me his wife.

Often I wonder what all this is for,

Why is this load so heavy to bear?

Why am I trying so hard?

It doesn’t seem to matter anymore.

Although I have come a long way,

From the misery of before,

Still I have to wonder,

What am I here for?

 

PLEASE UNDERSTAND

Please understand:

It wasn’t just the bruises that hurt.

It was the shame,

It was and is the names.

I was sinking,

Still do sometimes…

So low.

I feel I cannot live carrying this knowledge… must relieve it, but…

I don’t know how…

I sink…

I cry, give my soul to all the world.

Few can understand my plight.

Or could back then, either…

No one can fathom…

My psychology…

How helpless I felt .

I could not emotionally survive without him…

I could not save myself…

I turned on myself…

Blamed myself.

Excused him…

At times, how I loved him! Oh it was higher than the sky!

How I hated him, at others…

Then, confusion…

Then,

Vengeful…

Most of all,

Feeling, once more,

self-blame,

at the same time,

as Hate.

A cycle.

 

Why

Every day I wish that I could cry
Staring at a lapis lazuli sky
Sometimes I wish he could see
What exactly he did to me
Turned me inside out
But the tears are all gone, now there’s a drought
If I hit the switch
Who will thread the needle and stitch?
Angry orange sphere blazing down into the atmosphere
Why must you disappear? Why must you disappear?

Image

Image

Excerpts from my poetry book, Lost & Found

From my published book, Lost & Found.


See You (2003)

You…

I thought it impossible,

Not being able…

To see…

You…

I broke down.

I realized,

I care.

You mean the world.

And when you called,

I danced…

 

Echoes (2004)

Your laughter echoes, in the back of my mind, like a dream,

Like a cascading waterfall, tumbling down, tickling my memory.

An ECHO.

It’s just a memory.

It stagnates inside,

Stifles me.

This Pain (2004)

This pain…

Too excruciating.

This pain…

I told myself:

Never let yourself feel again.

So why did I?

Wanted to feel the love without the pain…

Torture,

Exquisite though it may be.

Still too awful to be perceived by anyone but me.

Reality.

http://www.amazon.com/Lost-Found-Violet-Yates-ebook/dp/B0051EZDZ2/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1392676691&sr=8-2&keywords=violet+yates+lost+and+found

If You Hadn’t Left Me

You used to say, Remind Me

If you hadn’t left me,

You wouldn’t live in such Misery.

Yes, perhaps you are right,

between the red, black & blue,

there would have been moments bright.

He used to say,

When he leaves you,

I’ll do you a favor,

take you back.

Thank you for your ‘generosity.’

Maybe I should be trusted.

Perhaps I can make my own decisions.

Put your guns…

Away.

I don’t want to play…

Anymore.

Introducing Jeff Dawson, author of Love’s True Second Chance

I would like to introduce my readers to Jeff Dawson, author of Love’s True Second Chance. He is an author I met via the Meet Our Authors forum on Amazon’s discussion boards.

I spent the last twenty-five years in the road construction industry. I have been married and divorced once with three grown children. I started writing years ago but never took it serious until I had back surgery in 2010. During the recovery process I looked at and analyzed my life. An article in the Dallas Morning News caught my eye about public speaking. “Hey, I can do this. But what would I write?” I reflected over my life and came up with the first work “Why did Everything Happen?” As turbulent as my life has been (bankruptcy, divorce, business failures and the death of my partner, my father and Debbie), there must be others who might benefit and be able to relate to my travels but were afraid to talk about much less write them down.

Loves True Second Chance is a continuation of the first work. I wrote about the woman I had loved for over thirty years. I wanted to let people know that Love is worth a second chance even if there is a possibility of a tragic end. We packed a lifetime of love in seven short months.

I am currently working on two novels One is a paranormal story occurring during WWII. The Germans might have conquered Poland but they have awoken an enemy they could never imagine except in their darkest nightmares; Occupation. The second novel is based on the largest battle in Eastern Europe during WWII which allowed the Normandy landings to be a stunning success.

I currently live in the DFW close to two of my grown children and three wonderful grand-daughters.


Excerpt from Love’s True Second Chance:

CHAPTER 1 THE END

July 20th, 2009 7:00am I held her hand and kissed her face with the arrival of a sunny beautiful morning, hoping for a miracle. The shift change for nurses and doctors was in full swing. Staff checking in, charts being reviewed, doctors and nurses exchanging information; vital signs being verified. Debbie’s breathing is very labored as it had been for the last twenty four hours. I never knew if each breath would be her last. The cancer was running its course through her beautiful body at a terrible pace. An aide came in to change the sheets and clean her up. She asked if I would like her to wash Debbie’s hair. I pondered the thought for a minute looking at the love of my live and replied in a hushed, choked tone, “She would like that. How long will it take you to change her bed and wash her hair?” She said about fifteen minutes. I stepped out of the room and called her friend Cathey to get an estimated time of arrival. She assured me she would be at the hospital within thirty minutes.

Debbie was in good hands with the aide.  I decided to get a little air, purchase a coke and have a cigarette. I went to the store with one thought running through my mind, Is there anything else I can do for her?  Had I done everything I could for the “love of my life”?  Would God sit by her side and let her live out her life on earth or whisper in her ear, take her hand, and guide her to heaven?  I had no control over what was happening to her.

Review of “Excuse Me, Where is the Exit?” by Stella Deleuze

I loved this book! The writer uses the 2nd person point of view to put the reader into the character’s shoes and it works. Women who are reading can identify with the main character in these cute stories. What woman hasn’t gone shopping for clothing only to find that nothing looks good or fits right, then finally finds the right fit after numerous attempts, only to have something else snag her? Who hasn’t planned a shopping trip, only to have the realities of life interrupt throughout the trip?

I especially loved the story about starting a blog, since I myself have just recently begun blogging. For those who aren’t technologically smart, it can be quite a challenge, especially when it comes to dressing up the place to make it look attractive. You have an idea in your head, but just maybe that idea is hard to achieve without technical know-how.

Good job, Stella! I look forward to reading No Wings Attached!

If you’d like to read Stella’s hilarious book, click here.